Molly Bloom knows style

Over at his site my well-dressed husband, Ted Rheingold, opines on scratchy pants and other wardrobe disposables.

Dear Michael Kors,

Hire me.

It is probably the ugliest bra ever made, the Bra-lellujah!. But I had to try it. I’m a believer in Spanx undergarments to smooth things under clothes and wanted to see if maybe, just maybe, they had figured out how to keep the girls in place with some knit wonder. It came in my size so hey, maybe this would work for the well-endowed.

Groan. No. So wrong and hideous looking! I had body-image vertigo from all sides. And it came with instructions explaining how to step into the bra and jiggle things into place. A seam runs across the cups which would show through most tops. Even in black Bra-lellujah! looked like a bandage.

Thumbs-down review aside, you can’t go wrong with Spanx undies. Power panties: accept no imitations.

I’m seeing lots of metallic leather on the horizon. Target’s high/low accessories line by Botkier has a range of gold leather products, including this clutch. I think it makes a great evening bag. I have no idea about the quality, although cheap bags are usually cheaply made. This bag fits my ethos of spending less on special-occasion items and more on well-made staples.

Coach has a new line of bags called Zoe. My favorite is pictured above. If I were in the market for a new bag I’d buy this one. It’s a good size and has solid hardware. And the color! It would look good with warmer brown toes or an all-black ensemble. Gorgeous.

Metallic leathers are making their way into other accessories. This belt from Banana Republic would look great with wide-legged wool trousers or atop a blouse or cardigan. My honey gave me a gold leather wallet for my birthday (with pink polka-dot lining!) and I feel fancy and grown up carrying it.

StyleShake is a site that let’s you customize made to order clothes. I’ve written about Dress Monkey, a site where guys can plug in measurements, choose style features and order a suit. These type of “custom” garments are not the same as bespoke, because you’re not working directly with a tailor. Measurements cannot be as precise and nips and tucks can’t be made in a final fitting because there isn’t one. What you receive in the mail is what you get, a made-to-order garment.

Measuring yourself is unreliable so ask a friend to help. Re-measure a few times to make sure you got the right lengths. Something I find tricky about Style Shake is their how-to measure guide; there are no depth of measurements, meaning the waist measurement falls at the same place regardless of size. For example, if you have a long-torso and need extra length up top, there is no consideration made. They seem to be working off a size system and you match your measurements with the closest size. The garments are one-of-a-kind but not tailored to your figure.

I do think this type of service undermines true custom clothiers. Most people can’t afford true bespoke clothes. But in a time when people are bemoaning the state of the world, keep in mind that the cheapest clothes are probably not fairly produced. I hope this made-to-order trend takes off but that additions are made for the tailoring of the clothes.

When I was in Paris I saw lots of fringe suede moccasins. “Dear god, do not let this cross the Atlantic,” I thought. And here they are, mocking me. Brown, suede, fringed; booties or full-on cross-laced knee-length. People are wearing moccasins up and down Valencia Street. Gah.

Part of my aversion to suede moccasins is my distaste for unstructured shoes. But mostly it’s because they remind me of this guy who my best friend’s headbanger sister hung around in 1984. And I hated his shoes even then. However I will completely cop to owning these loafer mocs in white that summer.

If you like nice things and have a hundred or two to spare, it’s time for Neiman Marcus summer sale. Woot!

Sometimes these sales are super sold out in normal sizes but a quick perusal showed this tunic-inspired dress in a range of sizes and marked down to $149. It looks like something I’d design, yes? Also on sale is this dang cute bag from Michael Kors, a real find because the handbags never go on sale. I’m thinking this bag would look great with my resort wear.

If you can do it with cash (not credit), I say it’s time to stimulate the economy and your closet. One bonus with shopping NM online is that you can use your Visa or Mastercard debit, which you cannot do in-store. They’re Neiman and AmEx only.

I’m not in the market for a new bathing costume, mostly because this one is sold out in my size. Love those big bottoms and the separately sized bra top. Swimwear should be sold individually for the best fit, unless you’re buying one of those tiny triangles-on-string concoctions, in which case screw you for being skinny. Kidding.

This coverup is adorable, you should get it.

I’m of the opinion that zippers should be used and not seen. Hidden under the arm or enveloped in a back seam, dresses don’t need a clearly marked exit.

Enter a new trend: the ugly zipper. A too-heavy zipper with large metal teeth or unsightly contrasting border seems to be the zip du jour for some of fashion’s au currant designers.

Phillip Lim 3.1
Dang cute from the front, right? Love the pockets. I wonder if that metallic tissue fabric is scratchy; I’ve sewn dresses with similar material and I constantly felt it against my skin. Now click on the back view and tell me you don’t suddenly hate the whole thing.

RM by Roland Mouret
This kooky dress is a pattern-makers dream. It’s like origami. Then you see the back view. That thing is obscene. The zipper looks cold and hard. You need bloomers to wear this. Fail.

This special edition of Guy Friday comes at you on Monday. Special shout-out to dapper dresser Jackson West, who’s right — I should write more Guy Friday posts.

Spring 2009 was not the strongest season. Things got crazy in a way that menswear doesn’t wear well. I’m not going to say much about Fendi’s ridiculous wedge shoes — they write the jokes themselves.

Bottega Veneta, a brand I will wear when I become a rich lady, had a strong showing. As pictured above, the proportion of the pant leg looks great. It’s a full leg but it’s not flared and even translates to more traditional looks. And the one-color/multiple-patterns thing is working. I’m not sure what’s going on with the blazer-shirt thing; looks as though the sleeves are sheer, exposing the short sleeve of the top worn underneath. I imagine the sheer sleeves won’t translate to ready-to-wear but I’d like to see the blazer-shirt take off. Bottega Veneta makes legendary leather goods as well, hence the upscale cases and man-bags toted on the runway.

Dries Van Noten, Prada… Labels I usually love, showing ugly things: sandals with socks (Dries Van Noten), ballet necklines and superfluous halter straps (Prada).

Vivienne Westwood really turned it out with her collection. Not every guy could pull off this piped-in-white jacket but it’s fantastic. I’m not a fan of knit polo/golf-style shirts with suits because it’s a slippery slope to unacceptable pairings, however this look makes it work.